bloggin’

I read the blog of a woman who wrote a book that’s related to the field I work in; she writes about that topic but also about lots of other things, which puts some people off because they read her book and then visit her website and aren’t prepared for her candid discussion of the dynamics of her family and relationships and a million other little things. I love reading it because she’s eloquent and honest, revealing her insecurities and imperfections within the structure of a mostly happy life.

Lately she’s been feeling the pressure to not be quite as open in order to continue appealing to everyperson in her quest to sell books… so once again marketing strives to water down real life; reading lines is safer than ad libbing. So I left my first comment, anonymously, telling her how I felt, saying a bunch of things but including my theory about how blogging in general is great because we can all find a connectedness in the mundane details of life, be them about families or relationships or pop culture or pen caps, and how if you want to write honest, you should, because actually saying that which is most closely aligned with who you are, despite who reads it and despite its popularity, is an act of bravery. And I also mentioned that if I shared my blog with everyone I knew (family, coworkers, parents of the children I work with), I’m sure I’d be hearing a little dissension in the ranks as well.

Someone commented back saying that they would like to read my blog. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that in MY blog I mostly discuss cute boys or rock-wielding toddlers and record myself giggling incomprehensibly for ten minutes with my friend. I’m always afraid that if I get serious here, I’ll sound like I’ve plunged into a depression; I’ve seen those blogs where high school girls write rambling poems about their feelings and their boyfriends and why did you ignore me in fifth period geometry. I have a love-hate relationship with Stephanie Klein; I’m all for analyzing but I think there’s a fine line, and I don’t want to hear what Kelly in Boise thinks about a conversation that I had in my bedroom the other day. I have enough of sorting out the opinions I value from those I don’t in my real life; I don’t need to invite the internet to psychoanalyze me.

It’s interesting to see where we fall as bloggers… are we life-updaters, funny story-tellers, specific issue-discussers, or Carrie Bradshaw-emulators? Some of my real-life friends are getting bored with their own blogs, but I feel like I’ve tapped into something really neat. I’m not sure if I like sharing, the opportunity for a writing exercise, the chance to talk about myself and not feel selfish, or the chance to share the silliness of everyday living with those experiencing their own silliness. Probably all of the above.

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