excellent adventure

First, you need to go watch the trailer here.

Okay, I know, you couldn’t make it even halfway through. I understand. First of all, it took me like a minute to process that it wasn’t Speed. Is the lake house about to explode unless you throw it on the back of a tractor trailer and drive around the city and stay above 50, JUST KEEP IT ABOVE 50!

Yeah, not so much. The tagline for this movie is, “What if you found the one you were meant for but you lived two years apart?” Apparently they can’t just make regular hokey love movies anymore, they have to actually attempt to shatter the space-time continuum. This seems like a bit of an ambitious undertaking considering that the characters complete disregard the enormity of this idea and react to their situation like they just realized they both went to the same college: “Are you serious? I’m in the future and you’re in the past? No way!”

One of the characters lives in 2004 and the other lives in present day but they’re totally in love because see, they’re both trying to save innocent people from Dennis Hopper who is this retired cop who… sorry. Wrong movie again. If they’re going to live two years apart, why have it be now and two freakin’ years ago? What the hell can she share with him? “Say your goodbyes now, because the Pope is totally about to bite it.” At least go far enough back that she can taunt him with her knowledge of something interesting. “Hitler? Yeah, I heard he’s got some great ideas!”

Oh well, whatever. I love terrible movies. No more Speed references though, I promise.

Just one more. There’s a bomb on the lake house!

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